Static Wardrobe–Day 1

 

 

IMG_2905As planned, I started my fashion experiment on Monday April 10. Before the sun came up I was up for a video conference to Australia. 5 am is not my best hour; not only am I tired and cranky, but I am confused – confused where to find things, like the bathroom or my closet. For a good 15 minutes or so, I might as well be walking around with a bag over my head. You would think having my outfit already picked out would be a relief, but like I said, I was tired, cranky and confused. And add cold to that list, which made me happy for the cardigan sweater. Not to mention the additional blankets I wrapped myself up in like a mummy (from the waist down because I could not be wrapped in blankets visible on a video conference). I also sit in a lotus position most of the time when I am not in public. Don’t get me wrong: it’s not because I am a super yogi … it’s just a comfort spot for me. But really that’s not a good look in a jean skirt (even when I’m talking about 5am all by myself) so, thank you blanket, or I may have scared myself. in the middle of the conference call, I reached down to adjust the hem of my shirt and realized, yep you guessed it: my shirt was on inside out. I thought of making a joke about it during my meeting, but honestly I was having a hard enough time getting enough coffee in to make coherent sentences. I did not want to add any additional doubt to my competency.

It was a relief not to have to think about what I was going to wear …until panic set in when my coffee kicked in enough to remember I was recording two videos for my business. As I shifted gears to my logical, calming self-talk, I realized I could actually wear my static wardrobe for these and still look respectful, I just put on the dressier necklace and I was golden. Once I realized that, the thought of not worrying about what would work on screen was a huge relief.

After that, the day went off without a hitch, until I was eating BBQ with Tim. As I saw a chunk of meat oozing with sauce fall of me fork it was like slow motion … noooooooooooooo!! Protect the white tee shirt! I do want more than one wear out of this, because of my distain for excess laundry. Hmmm, I should have remembered this when I was choosing my pieces, that my clothes usually do not escape a meal unscathed. Thankfully my white shirt was spared as I scooted my chair out, like there was a fire under the table. Tim looked at me with a slight look of confusion. “Must protect the shirt,” is all I could utter after my panic.

Later that night when I put on my PJs, I was actually super excited to lay my clothes on the dresser, knowing I would put them right back on in the morning for my second 5am video call. Not having the annoyance of hanging them (or the aggravation of tossing them on the chair, with the nagging thought that they were decidedly not hung) was a very welcome peace. The pattern of thinking about what I was going to wear the next day as I got ready for bed was something that started even years before my time in fashion. But, it was especially important in the fashion industry: you could literally lose your job if your boss did not like your outfit. It has happened. More than once after a negative comment from an employer, my studio mate and I would slip out and run down to Banana, Club Monoco or Kenneth Cole grab a new outfit, and go about our day like nothing had happened. All in the name of fashion. (really, when you think about it, we were just protecting our jobs). So instead of thinking about what I was going to wear as I drifted off to sleep, now I could actually think about my call and the blessing of the day that was.

Confession: my closet is a disaster! To be perfectly candid, it is horrifying. Really. So I am pretty excited to clean it out, have a special spot for my static wardrobe and get rid of at least 50% of what I have. I am going to save certain pieces that are super memorable (this is a bit of a challenge for me since I have a memory for my clothes like a steel trap – I can attach real memory to almost every piece of clothing in my closet.) Certainly so for the important outfits, like what I wore on my first date with Tim. But also for the mundane things, like when Tim gave me a grey longsleeved Spam T-shirt from a deal he worked on when we lived in NYC and the times I wore it in public (honestly, it might have been memorable for you too if you saw me running around in a Spam tee shirt.) I do have a personal fashion archive, and that I will not part with.

Closet cleanout is coming … I can even post thoroughly embarrassing before and afters, probably shocking enough that I may get prospected by a hording reality series. Day two coming up.

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3 thoughts on “Static Wardrobe–Day 1

  1. Cute, even in a uniform you’re looking good. (No, I didn’t learn complimenting in Social, aka cotillion). LOL

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